amyaak, 一夕院落&#65292;花落谁家

late full moon on dawn sky after 3rd snow in Qiqihar, notheastern China.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

dark days passed, new hope in sunshine.

last weekends we played less pc games, for i too elated in purchase, including blank dvds, mouse&mouse pad, power sock to facilitate baby using pc or desk lamp without messy wires his mom usually ignores. moments with baby all bright, esp before i left him on Sunday 5pm, when i held him in arms&on laptop to watch TV. baby sometimes ate less dinner, &bargain for eating. i hope God not allow him suffer insufficient nutrition.
in the weekends i also saw local mafia members. the bus route me between QRRS dorms&Qiqihar railway station where baby's mom's house locates, namely No. 9 bus, usually jammed like a fish can. on Saturday dusk, just after i join the jammed bus, a young man stood against front door of the bus pushed me&let me here&there to stand, like there is a real rule aboard, but in fact its only message just to reveal his sovereign. them when bus passing some stops, 2 men just loudly quest the passengers if anyone leaving, if not then just passed the stops without porting. when i managed to approach the leaving door of the bus, a man stood against the door heavily profaning a girl, forcing her to browse on her mobile irritatedly. so long time rumor that QRRS&its area infected with mafia likely a fact.
the sermon in local church also less satisfying. the Priest said traveling to other city, a woman looks like his sister offered the preach, which likes other preaches by women i heard there, don't research the bible but just ruling out persuades sometimes commonplace reinforced by excerption from bible. and its point or examples of God's mercy quite trifle. in the night i dreamed of my Taiwan girl passionate&woke up to make water twice. also dreamed baby fell into a tunnel full of water, when we watched workers install pole of power line&electronic equipment. God let me avoid breakfast but joined office directly, where the sin, the monitor, profaned heavily, challenged me by closing office door persistently.
its a bright morning after 2 days snow, the 3rd in winter 2010. God, great bliss ahead let me fly in wonder. God, let my girls join me sooner, in our new families. i need family, as u know. let my business has its stance&boot up. save my works online. sanitize my girls in any situations. God, dad.

26/11/2010

sunny days after snow.^since yesterday i enjoy nice service from meebo.com, God saves. these 2 days sees more idle time online, also more time i enjoyed using the office in QRRS alone. in night buzzed baby's mom, who complained a lot about my abusing bonus. I let her shut up&told her unlikely borrow her money any more in the future. in night reviewed how baby love his own mobile with 2 toy cellphones, felt deep sorrow for my ignorance upon his dewy likeness, &decided if financially allows i will buy him a baby mobile phone in coming months. chill in dorm woke me up early 5am last dawn, so i made some changes in room layout against chill near window. this morning i found likely an official spy in dorm peeking my room. God, save my works, bring my girls into my family ahead!

15/11/2010

an auspicious day.^yesterday mostly pale, later in afternoon started 3rd snow in winter 2010. got official inform from cashier of the department to fetch bonus of ￥300. there i was even cordially told bonus directly into my bank deposit card is more than ￥1400, while most crew earns ￥2500 or so. so rich meanings in the bulk. the sky likely opener&brighter for me, for I see God's promise that I'm the most informed&decisive versatile. tried meebo's new service. read&tweet. baby's mom also relieved by the good news of long time rumored bonus, while baby busy with animation online&refused to talk to me as usual. i really hope sooner i can treat him a dinner he likes. God, thx for ur gift in time. these days i more&more sensed closer my girl Zhou&our marriage ahead. i know ur arrangement is the best for the Royal of China, my family with my girls&sons. God, help my mother in hometown recover from her dying age, as dad allows. Its a bright morning, God, thx for all beauty in my life.

14/11/2010

a day in celebrating.^yesterday finally got family namespace with about.me, a site just roll out off its beta stage. then posted tweet daily. the company, QRRS, dispatched bonus among its staff, the sinful monitor in office avoid informing me, while a tricky female colleague let me know&persuade me to fetch my share on my own, but she is not from official channel, so i did like usual: just waited for formally informed. got a game delayed days from web, so aspiring. left office in time. baby's mom told me my salary just arrived in my bank account, nearly a week passed after i received the salary sheet /invoice. on way left office, doubts of harms by the criminal minded demon in office let me anxious, esp. unease about if they steal my income from QRRS amid, now that i intended to be contacted only by QRRS official. God ceases it as i pray the Majesty not to let anyone on the earth can deteriorate my full responsibility&sight. the full moon especially bright. i know that's all of my Empire of China in God's shine. God, bring me what i deserve. shine ur Son&the Holy with seasonal gift. God, bring me my Royal of China sooner, my girls in our prime time.
PS: bonus arrived. the clerk woman informed me. i got ￥300 cash&￥1400 or so in bank deposit card. with the bonus, i just remit hometown ￥1000 for my duty. bought badly needed teeth brushes&paste, and my favorite drink, tea. Its a pale morning, but God u see, how blessing it can be.

13/11/2010

a day sees light.^yesterday mostly busy with posting recent photo for 2nd snow of winter 2010. China surveillance blocked some time, myspace failed my logon strangely many times, but later accept me to post the blog. sins in office again attacked heavily, now that their failure overwhelming&doomed. at noon activated family google apps' new services for small companies with their web domains. after dinner when i roamed outside QRRS Dorms, it turned clear why the monitor so furiously hated me: the sin losing its potency, &in horror of been found of the fact beyond his family! the dirty administrative of the dorms harnessed 4 and more camcorders in the corridor, one of its staff, the only provincial folk from Hubei, a Li, buzzed in at noon, inquiry about espionage software to filter cams' video for non-attendant alarm. so lots of trifle thoughts harassed me when i roamed in night. but after rested in dorm, my joy gathered. buzzed hometown to express thanks, &my offers to support mother's living there, with the rumored bonus. when i went to bed, it turns clearly a blessing day.

benzrad's recent photo blog:

From Days Through Dead Dark

From life as it extends

for google's picasaweb blocked within China mainland for years, here some digest hosted domestically.

baby son, warrenzh, 朱楚甲, watching movie online at home in snowing day.

late full moon rarely hangs above dawn sky of QRRS residential area.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

weekends snow in pure joys.

last weekends brings so many touching bliss that i hardly to reiterate. On Saturday i arrived early as baby's mom let, for baby's music lesson postponed. we played pc games till baby tired&slept on my shoulders. his mom left awhile to visit her school, i shown her pupils there baby's album i ordered online from 163.com with a discount from my blogging there. a visiting guest, a fat woman, baby's mom's friend, with her son who is baby's kindergarten classmate, also shown her admire upon the album. but baby's mom complained costly. baby woke up exactly when i laid comment improperly on my future relation with QRRS, my once employer. baby asked for gaming again. for to late for QRRS canteen's dinner time, i ate dinner there, with baby. his mom reported after visited bank that my salary, as well as the bonus rumored from my once colleague in office, both didn't transfer into my bank account. she agreed my settlement that i should live with what God offered, no hustle to make baby's life different from what we endorsed now.
the second snow, a heavy one, likely covered the half night. on Sunday morning i saw the beautiful scene. i played pc games with baby till he left with his mom to join his delayed music lesson in the direction of center of Qiqihar. there r moments so precious i enjoyed with my Taiwan girl. baby witness&correct some of my misleading. i sent he&his mom to bus, then returned to QRRS dorms by bus. i soon on bed napped, till coldness woke me up for i only cover myself with a woolen sweater. the joy in my heart so full, that i had to roam outside, ate dinner early around 4pm. after these, i still feel need to thank God for the bliss, so i look out for the local church. i don't want to join the praying party in church, early to the meekly sermon, but i m in urgency to be with God sole&alone, so i intended to join Internet Cafe to kill some time, even i dislike Chinese Internet cafe very much for dirt in it&among the surfers. then i found the church open, &the priest there chatting. so i approached, discussed him with my oath with God, my free of duty to support the church this moment assured by Heaven. when they started praying, i left to dorm, rejoin the church 6:27pm. a woman offers preach, which not so strong, but described half faith in God like many trifle family wives do. in night i woke up to make water 3 times. the full moon so bright in dawn, that i photographic her beautiful face at once when half nuked after urinated. God, save my work online, bring me my Royal of China, my family in warm places. God, thx for ur bliss which makes my life so meaningful&rich of beauty. God, never let me fail my girls, or the reverse.

benzrad's recent photo blog:

From 2nd snow in 2010 winter, pure joy

View all

Get your own

for google's picasaweb blocked within China mainland for years, here some digest hosted domestically.

QRRS front space in heavy snow.

Posted via email from be21zh.org, bring China abreast 21Century

Thursday, November 18, 2010

frost days, ice breaking in China democracy.

Its a frost morning since dawn. the sin, the monitor in office, urgent to declare last afternoon just before work over that it will snow in night, but it didn't. i saw so many bliss in the white among branches of trees outside of my window now. recent news has it that QRRS, the company offers me an office, had dispatched bonus directly into bank account of its staff. so, i likely can launch in coming days to equip baby son a tablet&printer/scanner in the aim to digitize his homework routine. God, let me do it with enough financial support from my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, the girl in serenity of plenty&dignity from Heaven. God, let me present baby son in this year end full of joys to glorify his presence on the planet. thx, Dad.

19/11/2010

a day archives.^yesterday again sees fruits. supplemented tracking family google albums&blogs. activated twitter's authentic with my yahoo account. left office earlier a quarter to avoid dirt in office. roamed additional time outside around QRRS Dorms after dinner. baby son talked to me when i buzzed in. in night rested eyes by scratching on paper instead of cellphone as i liked. this morning is a frost weather, but hopeful it will turn sunny at noon. God, save my works i appreciate, bring me into my new family with cozy workspace.

18/11/2010

a day for my 3rd wife, my girl zhou.^yesterday mostly bright, since morning frost clear itself gradually. at noon break, my Internet via corporate lan broke, as frequent cases, i decided to wait to see how long the penalty by China surveillance exerted. when i looked outside of office window, i saw my girl zhou at once. it took seconds before i recognized her, for she in a suite i first time seeing. nothing can ascribe my thanks to God for the moment, &how i satisfied by my girl zhou who so attracting me. its a busy day, i may concluded, reading, finished long time awaiting task, ie, adding traffic tracking code to all my family picasaweb albums, &blogs on google. in early winter night, God lets me own games from d/l&left office in time breezily. my salary again suffers loss, decreases to ￥1091, after last month resumed to ￥1600, presumable the normal stable standard but constantly in fluctuations since it was reached half year ago, just after i planned to buy baby a dell game pc. its so nice to know God already arranges my promising life ahead with my girls i searching on web so long. God, let me see the bright sooner&constantly!

17/11/2010

try to reach out for gift season.^yesterday sees again gaining from web. after noon break, started to research dell desktop as planed last night. contacted dell sell representative for detail, for its site blocked&broken on China mainland. in the coming hours, tried to contact possible credit lender/leaser among my once friends in QRRS, my once employer. all failed, in sunshine outside, till God lets me know enough of it. baby's mom got irritated at once as usual when i attempting to introduce my plan. never i would allow another woman as messy as her in my life in future. the monitor in office bought a car&shown nearby with his colleagues aboard, drove by one of his pal for he lacks driving skill nor license. i know no one's gift can be ascribed to mine, the Son who here to reclaim his land vested from history itself&Heaven.
God, let the coming season brings surprise to my Royal! God, let warmth of share of ur shine prevailing in the winter of 2010. God, bring me my new family!

16/11/2010

a day in danger.^It turned cloudy after noon. the company dispatched winter uniform. the facing guy in office brought mine to test if i would befriend him. i no doubt still on my heel. then the shit attacked me heavily in more than an hour. when i ready for a break after lots of reading. i haunted neighbor office rooms. a once follower of my computer enthusiasm proactively talked to me. so i tough him&others a lesson on computer's benefit on children's early education. when the guy attempted to brag his porn video collections, i told the hobby can lead to tastelss&impotent. on another room where there r 4 women, i talked about my brand online, my family members' id in the cyberspace. after returned to my desk, i saw the danger of spying&dispute among sinful minds in the office, praying God for fearless, for spreading my opinion in my blogs universally visible&unshakable. left office in time. in night buzzed hometown, for the second son of my second elder brother's requested talk online just before i left office. then i got known they exchanged the land phone between his house&my passed dad's. the demon's conspire to steal dad's wealth before dying mother left the world turned clear. God, let me defeat the devil, my second elder brother who hated&hurt me from time to time, once&forever in future&on my dad's land, for i m my dad's only heir. God, let me rich of lectures for people come forth with modesty, let my voice unbeatable clear&straight forth, let my web publication official from u, even enemies&sins i cursed in it conquered by its formidable, &decease to their cage of dim they deserve.
God, last night i relentless for plan of equipping baby with new digital gears. we need a gaming pc, a tablet, a scanner/printer to rid baby son off pencil&scratch of paper. with ￥7000 budget, baby son can earlier adopt digitalized homework&constantly lives online. God, grant me to act free of wants. God, even now its pale this morning, i know stars&lights belong to me anytime.

15/11/2010

bright Monday morning.^posted a blog to include recent tweets&comments, also noted recent events in office, &happy with baby son in gaming, at http://benzillar.blog.163.com/blog/static/942754620101015111341460/ . the morning is bright, since last Sunday. QRRS dispatched thick coat&the facing guy likely asked to bring me mine by the way, showily the favor when i busy with my task. God, bring my new family sooner! and the gift season coming!

benzrad's recent photo blog:

From life as it extends

for google's picasaweb blocked within China mainland for years, here some digest hosted domestically.

Chinese customs&a dirty play: burning ghost money for their relatives in grave.

benzrad, 朱子卓,rested in QRRS dorm.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

light still shiny over my Empire of China, over the dark in its deepest shadow, PRC.

last week a battle between the monitor in office and me almost led to violence. the demon insisted to close door when he be seat, while i insisted to let the office open. each time i left the office i let the door open, while the dog anytime recently did the contrast to show his animosity. the door was kicked&smashed quite some times by the dog with his foot, who felt he had an advantage in office. the floor, the once workplace of mine, long time turns a tomb in my view. none lives in it in light, but dark and wet chill, for God let it sink since the evil era since i left campus.
last weekends sees lots of gaming among my family at baby's mom's house. on Saturday baby seemingly felt a bit less attracted by pc games on the notebook, i also felt exhausted&can't live up as usual next day, barely got up around 9am to resume energetic mood for the new gathering with baby son, warrenzh, owner of warozhu.com, Hope of China. Sunday we gained again interest in pc games. we played lately till his mom urged us to leave, for she want to bring baby to haunt bookstore for comic books. i carried baby onto their way, against his mom's complains that baby lacks walking on his own feet when each time we were together i usually carry him on shoulders. returned to bus stop whose hosting place near QRRS, my once employer&my current lodge, i endured chill among some others waiting for the bus which most cases too overloaded like fish tins. the driver of 3rd bus i avoided refused to open door while temporarily ported, just to show its sinful despise to its customers. the hell enterprises as well as human in organizations on nowadays China mainland mostly poisonous like the driver, so silly&irresponsible for their vocations, for in China mainland, human individual is the most weak prey of the dog machine system, whose only belief is prey human.
Its a bright morning now, when my hope for new timespace is high. the facing gay buzzed a lot for his friend who committed drunk&licenseless&killing an innocent passenger in his 31's with a borrowed car on road outside of the province. the shit never cared about the life lost, but way to evade law's judgement. God, the shit land of China nowadays the cave of dirty beasts, only fire baptism can clean its sins. God, ur killing never miss, let it sharp time executes, that's my prayer for this new work week. God, save my Empire of China under ur holy shines, save my Royal of China intact in the sins sinking around us. death to death, rerise to holy.

15/11/2010

great bliss.^yesterday conjoint today is a great bliss for me. i saw breathtaking game titles reachable. in office i settled family web presence's backup online, claimed our accounts with a new Chinese site, inezha.com. also read a lot. the facing gay stayed in office lately, attempting bail out some dirty water from its last defeat 2 days ago. i waited in office near 7pm, enjoyed moment alone with coming message from the cyberland overseas. the night peaceful, except some seconds anxious about baby's mom's possible sins. this morning woke up at 6am, join office to strike a comment for the undisclosed disappearing law suite against the ruling cadres group, a killing dog machine on the dirty land of China which turns more and more brutal&insatiable. its pale now, God, save my work online. bring my new family with my girls.
Posted from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉

benzrad's comment on the day.

China nowadays accelerated to sink into dark extinction. the authority begged by all means for cadres' gangster to make sins in light of day time terror. the authority, mainly offspring of betrayer&gangster&winner among CCP's hijack of state power in the ruin of republic of China. they now shamelessly steal state power to grind&grill common Chinese as their prey. they buy overt murdering&life, they shame God's solely being creator of lives. they live mad&ruthless for death-match, falsely attempting to break out their cursed fate of annihilation.

God, save China from fire-baptism&rebirth. God, forever let Chinese nowadays on mainland memorize the brutal reality of worthless of life in PRC, &hope of new China in shine of human right. God, the evil doer, the authority of PRC, must pay its life for their slaughtering these decades, that's my prayer this pale morning, promise from the builder of new China Empire reset for 1109 years ahead, by benzrad&warrenzh, Son&Holy of Heaven. God, u see.

河大飙车案：律师遭解聘全案被和谐
from 政府丑闻 by xccds
中国河北大学"我爸是李刚"飙车案受害人家属近日解除了与代理律师张凯的代理合同。而有报道称，宣传部门近日也下令对此案全面新闻封杀。
*受害人父亲：解决了*

身为基督徒的维权律师张凯星期一在接受美国之音采访时表示，据他了解，陈家受到了各方面的强大压力，而他本人不久前也被承受高压的律所约谈，要求他终止代理这起"官二代飙车案"。张凯说，此案处理的模式不是依循法治，而是陷入一种恶性循环。
"我爸是李刚"不是说说而已，黑白两道主动帮摆平
from 萝卜网 - 人人都是艺术家
来源：http://blog.renren.com/blog/342118137/497922822
"我爸是李刚"果然不是肇事者的狂想、幻象（上）
from 肖雪慧的博客 by 肖雪慧
RT @jtyong: 李刚儿子一案判决结果，天理何在！李一帆案判决结果：李一帆因交通肇事罪判有期徒刑三年，监外执行。赔偿被害人家属三十万伤者五万。李一帆被实习单位开除，李刚被调往其它分局做副局长。张晶晶已经给河北大学及保定公安局北市区分局软禁在医院，禁止媒体记者采访..
RT @jmszl: 桃子猫麻：李刚的岳父的确是副省长，但这是次要的，李刚的舅舅的女婿是北京某局长，而此局长的爸爸是中央常委.....点到为止，不敢再说下去了，所有的人都能连起来。。。。建设有中国特色的社会主义国家。

Posted from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉

11/11/2010

bright day after a weak day.^yesterday sees family workshop expanding: family google accounts equipped with rememberthemilk's task management&backup scheme with backupify.com. its turned pale after noon break. i managed to harvest from web, but later had to contented with stuff nested on local hard disk. baby's mom said joined her colleague's celebrating dinner for somewhat certificate, the grandma lately near 8pm still there attending baby son instead of his mom. i checklist tasks scheduled, went to bed around 8:50pm when felt sleepy. God, these days i grew in faith of being Son. God, sustained my growth of faith in U. God, bring my new family sooner, with all bright plans of enjoyment!

9/11/2010

bright day.^yesterday is a day of triumph. gays in office heavily profaned. the facing evil half drunk, buzzed quite some of his buddies, arranging his new business tour the company offers together. i posted a blog to include recent tweets, hunting for games downloadable, which delayed me later than 6pm in office. the facing sin stayed to challenge me quite some time after work time over, but God shown me all enemies of my new Empire of China scattering, like the gay did last night: he left abrupt before i satisfied by gaining from web&joined a rich dinner in canteen near 7pm. on way roaming outside routinely, met the high rank in QRRS, a Zhou, told him the rumor of his retirement, express my gratefulness for his righteous arrangement upon my dispute with the company in those years. baby in phone encouraged me with laughs, so nice a day! this morning in office, i continued importing my wordpress archives into my 163 blogs, a new feature it just promotes for incorporating msn's dying blog system. when it suggested a discount of its online printing of album, i tried first time to subscribe album printing&paid online. our family album costs me ￥32.5. really cozy! hope baby&his mom surprise by the newest gift from me.LOL!! God, sells season is near, grant me to glorify Son's presence on the earth with shiny presents! God, let me do it.

benzrad's comment on the day.

http://622006552.qzone.qq.com/blog/1288933316
2可器的电线杆：世界的另一面 -- 腾讯博客 [http://twokeqi.qzone.qq.com]
让人民知道真相，国家将变得安全（问题是领导将不再安全）

so cute!

8/11/2010

bright morning.^its sunny today. posted a blog entry for recent tweets, and the happy moments gaming on pc with baby son, warrenzh. enjoyed bible radio at noon break now. thx, God.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

a bright week, horn echoes golden memory of baby son, warrenzh.

last week shown my more dependence on baby: 2 nights&2 days spent together with baby son, &countless moments when alone enchanted by memories of gaming on pc with the Spirit, baby son. the 2 weekends also saw baby started to differentiate himself from some of my liked games, some occasions i had to drag him to join our old games on the Acer notebook, from lingered in his animation online. his mom quite addictive to QQ farm game, most of nights i can imagine she left baby alone in animation while she busy with collecting vegetables in the game i despised.
in the second half of the week, i saw quite of bliss from my girls. some beautiful young lives in QRRS area re-appeared when i missing them days, for they shown affection on me in these months while i felt i can't improve them by weaving them into my closest life or family bond. but a radio in noon break on Friday reminded me my expanding social graphic is family of Gospel, is under God's shine, so never it turns burden for me, nor for my Royal of China. for impossible is God, for plenty&peace of love is the ultimate landscape sustains healthy&wealthy of people. my heart broaden by the gospel, seeing Christian is the source of pleasure for anyone, seeing i can exchange with girls that loves me with faith in goodness while i likely passing them by.
this weekends full of games playing. i felt so exciting that a bit tired in dorm after the 2 days. games brought me so many happy time, while my girls longing for our gathering, that sometimes lets me sorry. but i trust God to free me off anxiousness upon possible unbalanced response among endeared callings. God, i don't want to be a nerd or geeky in the meaning for self-indulge or self-entrenched, forever let beautiful things, including human souls esp. of girls, enriches my life, upgrades my linkage with the holy. God, never allow me failing my beloved, i entreat u.
BTW, in dawn of Saturday dreamed of lots of snakes under my clothes on my body, caught one who biting my palm harmlessly. this dawn dreamed of being a commander of Germany troop or some lateral organization, likely from the game, lost horizon, i played with baby these days.

5/11/2010

a night harbored near baby son.^yesterday i won a lot from web, as God grants. in office work time, clear most unread feeds. left office soon after work over, buzzed baby for i felt touching love&mercy on him in the dusk, found his mom stayed in her school while the grandma there attending him. decided at once to go over to accompany him. he was watching TV with his grandma when i arrived, his mom brought away the game notebook, &the legacy desktop yet power on. so i turned on the desktop&trying to show him newest games' trailer video. but his mom soon returned. after dinner we joined our pastime games, succeeded some missions, partially aided by online guide. his mom urged me to leave after some gaming, but later allowed me to sleep on baby's bed, while the grandma slept with her&baby son in bedroom. the night so happy till baby felt sleepy, for he stayed 2 days at home for cold, &didn't nap in daytime as routine in kindergarten. i busy with trying new games&theme packs on the Acer notebook, after 10pm. in night i guarded in dream for my family. got up early but don't felt exhausted. exchanged morning bliss with baby son, who got up lately near breakfast, join office when it outside still like a frozen weather. i hope i see sunshine later today, for time spent with baby son so meaningful. God, bring me my new family with my girls. save my mother in hometown who said dying ill.

4/11/2010

mother's health reportedly worsen.^yesterday is a bright day. i read&d/l. refined hometown, Zhudajiu's google profile even been blocked from saving changes for hours. the facing evil started a business travel, while the monitor insisted closing office door to profane nearby. God drove it away later, out of my notice. in night when i buzzed baby, who still refused to receive my call, his mom told me my elder sister from hometown told her my mother dying, &suggested me return to hometown. i rebuffed, for economic reason as well as holy message. God, u see how my life here meaningful. God, bring me my new family with my girls! i need a family to cater to baby son, warrenzh, owner of warozhu.com, Hope of China. i need a new family for the prosperous of new Empire of China reset. God, u see.

3/11/2010

a night reunited with baby son&Asoh Yukiko.^yesterday sees my elation with game "medal of honor". left office with another bonus from web&in time for dinner in canteen. the web answered via google our problem in a game "lost horizon", can't help buzz baby when roamed outside after dinner about the solution for the pinched mission in the game. but baby refused to talk to me. in last Sunday dusk he shown reluctance to let me leave, after a full day's gaming on notebook. so i sensed baby missing me. near returning to dorm, i decided to visit baby&stay with him a night in his mom's house. God grants my action. on the last bus, a girl student shown me her tenderness, which aggravates my energy of sole presence. baby was attended by his mom on his homework when i arrived. i waited silently aside till he join me with the game "lost horizon", in which he insisted longer than i expect to play. then i shown him game trailer of "medal of honor", which quite refreshing him, among his mom's complain of late sleep. the night i slept alone in baby's room&almost sleepless. dreamed of Asoh Yukiko&our love making. it took longer time to satisfy ourselves in the dream. also dreamed a graduated hometown girl. in dawn, talk to baby while he on bedroom, that his everyday can not be more perfect in God's glory, &my single task to expand our family on the earth. join office in bright sunshine. God, bring me my new family to cater to baby's growth, God, i need peace&luxury of family in new set.

2/11/2010

a busy work day.^yesterday full of bliss. posted a blog to include baby son's photos in recent gathering. posting was challenged by new spy&blocking network gears in the company, likely just next floor in the same building, done narrowly this morning. gays in office also exerted its best dirt upon me. but the fruit of the day is sweet, no matter on stuff online or offline. in the night when i roamed outside, sexual power lingered on me quite some time. this dawn i woke up&sensed it again. i gradually recognized the source of the thick desire. now its a brilliant early winter morning, God, bring my beloved to me, let me join my girls in our new family! God, protect baby against boring&tasteless.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

golden early winter, dry&blonde atmosphere in memory of Son.

Its a brilliant weekends. so much glorious moments with baby in pc games. we tried different games, mostly we proceeded missions successfully. baby also first time noticed the rich of game store i collected. its also a week i totally ditched mouse in office. i also got irritated awhile with baby who once refused his animation online, a domestic product&quite orthodox&boring or even poisonous in my view. but we soon rejoined those wonderful games together. Its 2 sunny days in sequence. his mom, emakingir, sometimes, quite more occasions, got irritated by baby's lighter mood, &she also sometimes felt losing upon my attitude for the glory of God. God sees her way out in the perished situation her family sins brought&lingering in her soul. before we departed the beautiful Sunday dusk, we dined out near the bus stop we routed when baby came over to join his music lessons in area of QRRS, my once employer. baby turned agile&got anger from his mom. i guess dogs barking upon baby, so i finished my dinner hurry&attended baby outside of the restaurant earlier before his mom dined. i told baby in the breeze of early winter again that nothing on the earth can harm him, any insult in fact God's gift for him, and times rewards perceivable later for polishing or redeeming his glory which none on the planet can dent upon. his mom again upset by me&fetched baby abrupt leaving without proper courtesy. in night i join the local church. a man in a suit likes cop's aside me, some more old men closely behind me, they let me dozed for about seconds, then i resumed&enjoyed the sermon which is stronger than ever. after expressed thanks after the meeting, i buzzed baby for the fear&sorrow i sensed upon baby's asking me staying later in his mom's house. God, saves baby from boring&his mom's meaningless scorns rampant recently when she felt losing. God, bring my new family sooner where i can care&enjoy together life with baby son who is so smart&growing like thunder. God, bring my girls in our prime time in our new marriage, God, i honestly entrust u!

29/10/2010

a wonderful day.^yesterday is a neat&fit day, near 5:20pm, i packed my portable&left office free of anxious. but in the beginning of afternoon is not so lucky. when it turned pale in sky i left office to visit baby in his kindergarten, as i had the idea last night in dorm, for the day is Oct 28. the guard of the kindergarten, likely a retired cop, locked me outside after i shown him my national ID card&lots of explains of my identity, yet refused to bring my son outside to allow me exchange words with baby, but only convey a bottle of juice i bought to baby. i know God's setting to raise the Son. in night when i first time buzzed in, baby cried at home for juice for his mom refute him. its a night without moon, but stars clear. God, can't it less wonderful? bring my girls to me, God, i entreat u.

28/10/2010

a day of Asoh Yukiko.^yesterday is really a winning day, just like what i told baby son last night, God rewards times for what the Son suffered: i got full of stuff i admired of from web. this dawn i dreamed of Asoh Yukiko, my Crowned Queen from Japan, who lingered quite some time with me in dream, till i had to got up to make water. its so passionate in dream, &so successful, that i never expected. since this moment Asoh is part of mine, as my wife. Its a bright morning, with fresh hopes&messages. God, u see.

27/10/2010

blocking heaps higher.^yesterdays sees surveillance against my Internet traffic tighten rein. i tried more than 30 times with breaking firewall tools, none succeeded. dog behind the blockage laughed. in night after dinner received baby son&suggested haunting KFC nearby, his mom accepted. but she dislike KFC food after read scandal report of its China franchise. i told baby anyone don't acquaint the Son nor God, is sinful&dead prejudged. a family whose son classmate in baby's music lesson also dined there. its a great moment for me, for baby likes it.

26/10/2010

a day to save.^yesterday narrowly finished workload. posted a blog for the 1st snow of winter 2010, includes recent photos, and panoramas rebuilt by photoshop. till near 2pm done, across the border of China surveillance. my mouse left in baby's mom's house, so i intended buy a new one, &some blank dvds for backup. all the afternoon i doubting borrowing ￥100 from a guy in neighbor dorm who loaned me triple times total to ￥100, with the amount i returned him last Sunday night. but the devil refused me at once trickily, with another gay spy present in the dorm. i know God, Asoh saves me from evil lure of companion, which developed for months aiming to dent on my glory. on way roaming outside, i pray God for his bliss in time, glory of the Son forever untouchable, from the trap of humiliation. this morning i didn't buzzed hometown as God lets. QRRS, my once employer, dispatching bottle water in parcel among staff, but no one in office informed me. God, i only receive life support from my family, form Asoh Yukiko, my Crowned Queen from Japan, let it plenty&unbreakable. Its all time bright today. God, bring my girls to me in our new life ahead.

baby's works: colorful early winter sky above Qiqihar

baby ate fried sausage, his mom's favorite

dad&son, 朱子卓和朱楚甲, family dined out after a joyful weekends with pc games.

for google&flick blocked within China mainland for years, here some copy hosted domestic.

panorama of XiaoYin music school, baby son having his last lesson here, for its charge a burden for his parents' mean salary..

family rejoined in KFC after baby son, warrenzh, 朱楚甲, Hope of China, owner of warozhu.com, finished his night music lesson nearby.

Monday, October 25, 2010

1st snow of winter 2010, holy killing.

last weekends again i had only half of a day to stay with baby son, but much rewarding. we found lots of pleasure in games, a small game even brought baby son fun to probe it. the sinful grandma there peeking baby&exert ill will upon the holy, lured baby son to try to defeat a boy student there restlessly. she even called me to watch the ugly game. baby&me, we soon joined watching a game trailer online together, while the old demon exile without our attention. so did the boy student. after his mom returned, baby yet insisted my trying another shooting game with him before i left, around 5pm when dorm's canteen serves dinner. that's really a gliding happy time among us.
mother still in treatment, &i hardly judge the perspective of her survival. God surely heard my call&affirmative to me. i kept it calling in in morning after i got up in serial days. however, yesterday my cellphone ran out of charge, so i buzzed in lately at noon, when i waiting baby's mom from her school outside of her house, after visited telcom office. i talked with my younger elder sister&her husband, who came over together to see our ill mother. i told her again my budget of ￥20000 for mom's restore her health&survives another 3 years. she laughed&let me just keep on my own business, let hometown relatives on their own.
returned to QRRS dorms, i listened a sermon can't be more cohesive. after let baby know my taking part in church on phone, i launched to try hdr composition of photos. after tried some small warez, i soon found photoshop is the most powerful tool, killing any small softwares. i continued to export my panorama via photoshop with new trust on it. the dorm's lavatory's re-furnish also finished, i enjoy washing&toilet first time since the noisy&dusty project launched.
this morning when i first caught sight of the sky outside, i sensed it might snowed. it did. so i shot some photos from my window at once, preparing a blog for the saint moment. i once doubting the killing by the white angels might hurt my mother in ailment, but i insisted God promised me. after breakfast, on way to office, i buzzed hometown, empty on the phone in my passed dad's house. but eldest brother talked with me on his mobile, said mother's health got improved. kid brother, who always active, brought his wife&son to the county, likely let mother alone in the old house. so far, i can't gain more positive news from my concerned. God, let it enough&steadily resuming to normal.
Its a bright morning now. i had problem with upload my photos entrenched by China surveillance, but God helps it proceeding forward. God, care my girl young&agile. bring my new life in our prime time. God, let me have the ability to upgrade baby's homework to digitize it, let me later or sooner buy baby a child mobile, for which he longing. God, bring sunshine in my life here&in my hometown. enhance my kid brother's finance with a sound&ever growing business he likes.

From life as it extends

for google&flick blocked within China mainland for years, here some copy hosted domestic.

echo of summer memory: happy seashore aside River Nen, where baby son played months ago.

outside scene of benzrad's QRRS office: 1st snow&a shallow one in winter 2010.